Raising Independent Children

Parenting comes along with a feeling of elation and happiness, but also with a huge responsibility of rearing an individual, who is capable and confident as a human being,  an individual who is peaceful self-reliant and dedicated, but above all, a kind and generous soul.

Raising  children must include an environment that affects their social, emotional and psychological development in a positive way. He/ She should proceed towards a self-reliant adulthood which of course is difficult. Parenting nowadays has become more difficult and challenging with the advent of nuclear families and both working parents. We, as a society,  have been completely transformed and are advancing towards a more advanced gadget millennium at an alarming speed and, independent kids are the need of hour.

We love our kids but over indulgence in all their activities is disastrous.  So support them, love them but let them be what they are.

From the beginning, let your kids play whatever they want to, guide them, protect them, but don't dictate terms in their play area.

Let them explore, don't scold on the pretext of safety.

Give them choices, respect their decisions, from food to clothes. Let them choose; help them in choosing but don't make them dependent on you for little choices. Guide them, but let them choose and learn from their mistakes: always be there for an embrace and a hug if they need a shoulder to cry.

Use them for little errands.  Teach them small tasks in and around the house, trust them with small choices and appreciate their endeavours. Don't push them too hard when they can not spontaneously learn. 

Show them the good/bad side of everything. Punishing them too hard for minor mistakes is the worst thing you can do. Be lenient and supportive;  small rewards make them achieve higher in academics.

Show interest in their creativity; appreciate the little tasks done by them.

Working parents in order to overcome the guilt of not spending enough time with their kids tend to shower their kids with expensive gifts. Remember, we need to give them quality time and not quantity in place of our time.

As responsible parents, it is our duty towards the society to raise a child, who is capable, independent and isn't afraid to face the adversities of life, who can face challenges and achieve the best in the worst of a situation. Over protectiveness and over indulgence in everything they do should be avoided as it leads to children being self-absorbed, who often misunderstand it and follow a path of self destruction in defiance to your decisions.

Parenting is about pledging to raise healthy, stable, capable and independent children who can ultimately learn to trust themselves in situations and are ready to face the adult world, without you rooting at every step they take.

Dr. Indu Bala, Parent

2019-2020